MIND BLOWN
Tuesday, January 24, 2012 ● 11:46 PM
today is wednesday.......just 2 more days awaylucky it is friday,where i can get to see how it goes on thursday first
but what kind of excuse am i going to give?
and i don't want it to be in school
i want it to be someplace with more privacy,maybe a park or by the beach
and am i going to come totally clean?
to explain for my weird behaviours?
i'm sorry that i couldn't keep my promise
i really want to be more than just friends
i'm sorry that i had put pressure on you
it's really not my style usually,but it just so happens
i'm sorry that instead of helping you,i've made you sad
there was no excuse for it,it was purely a mistake
i'm sorry that even in times that you truly felt fear
i'm just there and couldn't do anything at all
most importantly,i'm sorry
for things that i could have done and haven't do it yet.
i wish i can say this all in front of you
i only fear rejection
but still,shall see how it goes on thurs
it nothing goes wrong then
i might just say it
and again,i am sorry
BELIEVE
Tuesday, January 10, 2012 ● 8:45 AM
this was the word i said just a few months backand i'm already losing it
is it wrong for me to love a person? not like i can control it right?
why do you make it so hard for me to believe?
and i'm starting to lose my smile.....and i can do is only fake it
only now then i feel the pressure of having huge responsibilities
GL HEAD.....
the pressure never came to me till my GLs start to lose it before the whole thing even starts
if you all are already pressurized now,what about the camp?
the promise i made to BF and Howard,i will lead my GLs to awesomeness
even though we were only left with a little time
but i BELIEVE in them,they were hand-picked by us
i don't see why they don't have the capability to step up
and now sem 2 comes with presentation and projects.....
i really can't wait for Grad Party to finish
its wasting alot of my brain cells and energy
and i realised working twice a week till closing actually is enough for me to earn some cash and save up for the HK trip in april......really can't wait :D
I HAVE TO FOCUS
even if the world were to end soon,probably not
I WILL ENSURE THAT FOCAMP 12/13 WILL HAVE THE BEST GLS IN THE HISTORY OF CLS CAMP.
EVEN IF THE EVENTS CMI,I WILL HAVE TO MAKE SURE MY GLS CAN DO IT
MY GLS,I BELIEVE IN YOU ALL,GO FOR IT AND RAISE THE STANDARD OF CLS GLS
MY NEW LAPTOP
Sunday, November 27, 2011 ● 10:03 AM
IS SO FREAKING AWESOME HAHAHAHAHAlol,something i've been wanting since the start of poly
luckily my sis agreed to buy for me without asking much questions
but i need the com more than i wanted it
i5 processor for a 8gb ram for only 799 plus a blue ray disk combo
and also a wireless mouse and an 8gb thumbdrive
seriously,my com cant get anymore awesome than this
well,somebody is finally eating the chocolates i gave
this shows that she is doing pretty well despite of the busy schedule :D
can't believe she really followed the conditions i gave.....or is it just cause she got too man chocs to eat?
well,i don't really care now,not that i don't care about her,its just that i got more things to do now
and really,i don't have time to get my mood down.
mst is in a week,cell bio formal report is done,IOchem dues on tues
damn,i still gotta meet hannah later afternoon,work tmr night,AWESOME CM camp on wed and work on thurs night.......yep,im pretty screwed this week....
but in the mean time i'm just gonna enjoy the wonderfulness of my new laptop XD
gonna configure it as soon as possible :D
Drowsy
Sunday, November 20, 2011 ● 9:37 AM
escapade on saturday really drained me out totallycausing the whole of my sunday to feel SO DARN SLUGGISH
but nevertheless,i don't regret volunteering for it
FOR IT REALLY WAS FUN!!!!
i got to meet some potential juniors
and also took part in a FLASHMOB!!! HOW FREAKING COOL WAS THAT??
and also some seniors that eventually became good friends with us
the sacrifice was WORTH IT
and the 2 hours of partying,WHO WOULD'VE THOUGHT
i saw a few of my friends whose eyes popped out when i started techtonik
HAHAHAHA the feel was so great last night,i wish it hadn't stop
it reminded me of sports camp,disco night
but i only jumped till my fill then,and the DJs weren't that awesome
yesterday i felt the music and move along to it
the feeling was good and really,reality wasn't in my head
it felt like clubbing,but just better for everyone there was with the intention of having fun
and not getting hooked up or something
now i understand whats clubbing,and trash those people who tarnished its name
its really fun to just let loose like that
even though i lost my voice and felt lethargic for one whole day
THANK YOU ESCAPADE!!!!
Distracted
Tuesday, November 15, 2011 ● 8:18 AM
came back home from work and i'm tired like crazythough the day did not progress as i had expected,
i somehow felt a little better than yesterday.
but the words are still ringing in my head,and doesn't feel like its going away any time soon.
that pretty much all i can think of.
for the first time in my life i actually stoned out right in front of somebody within a few minutes
and couldn't think straight during work.
and i thought today's schedule could distract me away
but i got distracted by it more.
seriously,i don't know how much more my mind can take it
it the same damn thing all over again
do i have to wait again??
i waited 5 years previously,trying my best not to give up,
but in the end i just had to move on
and now it happens again
is this karma??? if it is then just let it fall on me!
not the person i care the most for!!
with all these things happening,i feel like walking at the beach again
at least there have memories,good ones
even a while,i just wish to escape for reality
for right now,it ain't the best part of my life
Affected
Monday, November 14, 2011 ● 7:01 AM
just a few words,simple wordsit has affect me all the way till today
perhaps i tried too hard to keep in it yesterday
but,i almost wanted to just break down after blowing up
it's not anyone's fault,just that
sometimes,words hurt more than we think they do and
at times where we didn't think things through
and spurt some words that should been said
the damage has already been done,and nothing can revert it back
so please choose your words carefully
for you might never know which poor soul's heart you might be breaking
A conclusion made on 11/11/11
Friday, November 11, 2011 ● 9:03 AM
well,actually now is 12/11,but hey who cares,i'm still gonna talk about how special my 11/11 is. For most people,they should be having classes and stuff,but for me,i was more worried about the tings happening after classes.First off,GL head selection and GLs interview.......
I AM SO DAMN AFRAID i can't even make it into the GL team uh T.T
I really REALLY wanna be a GL that bad!
but since my interview was already over,it wasn't my results that i am worried about,but more of your's. Plus you were the first one and i didn't get to say something to you before you go in......I WAS SERIOUSLY FEELING EXTRA GUILTY. hopefully both of us can become GLs uh.... :D it's gonna be tough,but i'm ready for it XD
Secondly,YOU
ok the conclusion is more of for this part.
Ok,the secrets is out,so what? Like the whole world know already =.=" (THANKS UH FRIENDS)
so since you already know,i don't even bother keeping it as a secret from you.
But things happened just SO DARN RECENTLY,think we both agreed to just become good friends. Not sure if you read my blog or not but,hey,stop keeping secrets from me. i meant like those things that upsets you,just pour it out. but that aside,i give you my promise,nothing is gonna happen between us,and i'm seriously happy enough to just be able to chat with you like good friends should.
so basically,we're just gonna be friends and NOTHING MORE,my friends who sees this,please get it clear into your head,me and her are NOT together,and will NOT be this time. so STOP TEASING HER AND ME,IT'S JUST ME THAT YOU NEED TO TEASE
.......ps:why the heck do you say that i'm legendary when telling me to others???and which part of me is???